Ya Allah please take this spell away from me.. far away..
I can't stand looking at myself losing weight... Lost my appetite.. not eating at all.. ruining my own self day by day.
I can't stop looking in the mirror without feeling pathetic.. Everytime I look into the mirror I've always thought..
"Look at this pathetic bitch. Been cheated huh? You fuckin deserve that."
I don't think I can move on.. With you in my mind all day long. With me asking myself over and over again about why did he do that to me.
I know there is no answer to that. That's why.. I can't fucking sleep. I've been losing my sleep the past few days. It's killing me slowly..
I'm tired as fuck, I can't even think straight.. or walk straight.
Look at me.. Still waiting for your text messages, your calls, your whatsapp.
Everytime my phone notification comes in, I ran to get it expecting it might be you..
But it was just me hoping too high from you. Of course you'll stay in silence. You won't say anything....... about what happened. Nothing.
I still look at my phone everyday feeling empty as fuck. Look at your whatsapp's last seen hoping it will change.
"Last seen on 7/3/2015 on 7:51AM"
it was...... 6 days ago.
Please don't scold yourself like I do now.. Eat. Make sure you'll get enough sleep so you can work tomorrow... Don't overthink things like I do right now..
It's fine to me.. But please don't do it. You'll hurt yourself..... I don't want that to happen.
I know you can move on.. You chose this. I can too.. But it takes time.
